Escape

I needa get outa here

ive had it with my family. I mean its enough to have a rough day at school with people giving me shit, but to come home and have it continue just makes it worse. I hate my brother. Ive never met a bigger lying good for nothing ass hole. Its always his way or no way, which is always the slow dumbass way. He always is trying to be in my room, using my old shitty computer which i have tried to make good instead of his new fucking macbook that my parents so nicely got him. That makes a bunch of fucking sense. I try to stay in my room cuzz i dont like being around him, because we always fight, because im sick of fighting, because i hate yelling. And with him in there, he acts like its his room. He tells me what i can and cannot do, complains to me about my computer sucking balls, and gives me shit when theres stuff i want to do in my room that is bothering him. He never leaves when i want him to. Never. He takes his own sweet time. He always tries to instigate and make problems bigger. He starts tellign me to calm the fuck down and to not touch him. I swear he fucking takes baby steps out the fucking room. The must aggravating shit ever. And then i finally cant take it and push his ass out, and then we are tackling eachother to the ground, while my parents try to break it up. I wish they wouldnt break it up. I want to kick his ass so bad. He deserves it and needs it to realize that he aint better than me. He just doesnt get that i like my space, and that i dont like him. The shit he says, its worse than anything i get at school. Sure he has the usual ur gay and a fag and a loner shit, but then he just takes it to a whole nother level. To be told by your brother that you should go comit suicide, and that you need counseling and that you are the type of kid to shoot up a school, its the worst thing in the world. It doesnt help at all, im already insecure as it is, never knowing whose my friend or not or who will be for me when i most need them, and to here this just makes me want to leave it all. Worst part is, he says this shit to my parents, and my dad agrees. I wish he'd move out. He's 4 years older than me and the laziest ass hole i know. He goes at his own slow pace at life and thinks hes smarter than everyone else. He has so many opportunities and he's wasting them. Im sick of having to be held back. I have to stay in this damn house and put up with them for no reason. They are always trying to hold me back, when i know for a fact that i can take care of myself. Ive held a job on my own and want to be more independant. I got my license but am not allowed to pay for my own insurance. The only reason i want a car is so i dont have to be home when he is. So i can go out and be happy, or just go out and be by myself for all i care, i just want to get away. I really hate being held back. They think im a little kid when i could survive so much better in the world than my stupid dumb fuck brother.

I really miss having someone to talk to. I think it makes all this a lot harder.

Well Noone, i guess when you read this you will either now know why i am how i am, or think i am even crazier than you did before.

song
12 Apostles, beautiful place. Noone, you should go one day.

peace out